On Friday November 20th, I attended one (of two) days of the "Lifelong Faith Formation" seminar/workshop/conference/whatever. It was held at St. Elizabeth Ann Seton Parish in Absecon. Honestly I had no idea what to expect in terms of particulars, but my expectations were fairly low. (This way I could be pleasantly surprised.) I hoped to come from the day with a few ideas for our parish pertaining to RCIA or adult religious education, and maybe some curricula to flip through. Well, I really didn't get either of these. As it turns out, the seminar was mainly intended to help parishes implement a specific "faith formation" program. It was largely an "insert Tab A into Slot B" type of thing, with some options to make the program suit your own "community," but it was definitely a program. And yes, it was alarming, but I'll talk more about the program generally in the future.
During the seminar there were many nifty little ideas floated by the presenter, few of them recognizably Catholic, and many of them somewhat odd. That's not to say there was nothing of use and that the presenter didn't seem like a good, kindhearted person. It just didn't seem overly...Catholic.
Anyway, people from different parishes, all in various states of confusion and chaos, got up at one point to talk about ideas they had to tailor make the program for their own parishes, whatever those parishes might wind up being. During one such opportunity a woman from a parish in St. Mary's "merger/closure group," a religion/theology teacher at Sacred Heart High School,* stood before the whole room and suggested the use of something called a "prayer rock." (Now, if my child was attending Sacred Heart High School, I think I'd have asked for my money back at that point.) Since no one in the room seemed to have heard of this, she explained. I share this with you not as an oddity to be gawked at, but as just another example of all the other oddities that day, some of which I will share with you in future posts.
Here is a step-by-step "how to" for those interested in employing the "prayer rock."
Step 1: Select Your Rock.
Step 1: Select Your Rock.
Step 2: Select a piece of fabric with which to wrap your rock.
Step 3: Wrap your rock in the fabric.
Step 3: Wrap your rock in the fabric.
For extra credit, add a color-coordinating ribbon. (As you can see, I chose yellow fabric and a yellow ribbon.)
Step 4: Place your rock on your bed pillow.
If you are less hard-core in the prayer rock realm, you can stick the rock under your pillow instead, as shown below.
Step 5: Sleep with your rock (or try to, anyway).
Step 6: When during the course of sleep you are bumped in the head by the rock (as in OUCH!!! What the heck is THAT???!!!) and awoken, you will remember to say a prayer.
Step 7: Hopefully at this point you will consider yourself a complete idiot for having attempted this ridiculous exercise and next time try a novena or a visit to the Blessed Sacrament instead.
When we discussed this exercise here at Save St. Mary's, it occurred to us that we do not want those of you without prayer rocks to feel bad. This being South Jersey and all, without many sizable rocks, (my rock came from out of state, actually,) if you don't have or cannot find a decent prayer rock, we thought you might consider the use of a prayer dog. Every time you pet your prayer dog, it can remind you to pray. Now if you don't have a pet or are allergic to dander, you certainly must have some shoes, so why not prayer shoes? Every time you put them on, you can pray. Or, you could put a pebble in your shoe and every time your foot gets jabbed by the pebble you can say a prayer. Really there's no end to the amount of prayer items you can have. The important thing, we suppose, is that you wrap your prayer item in attractive fabric.
Seriously, I could not make this stuff up. All steps besides #7 were true to the prayer rock method as described. My only regret is that the day was pretty much a complete waste of time and money, other than as fodder for the website and continued evidence of our diocese's demise.
If the examples given from the day's workshop were the only reasons St. Mary's cited for resisting merger and closure, they would be reasons enough.
*As an aside, this is from her syllabus for the class Intro to Catholicism/Senior Theology. They are the five "competencies" the students are supposed to accomplish.
1. To know the main issues it Catholic Social Justice.
2. To gain a basic understanding of the effects of Catholic Social teaching on the world.
3. To foster the discernment process for their future lives.
4. To initiate comprehension of the significance of the human body as a gift from God.
5. To develop a global understanding of their role in society.
So Catholic social justice, personal discernment, sexuality, and social roles are what one should be learning in a Senior Theology/Intro to Catholicism class. Social, social, social. Huh. Seems to me there are some significant things missing, like maybe God???
When we discussed this exercise here at Save St. Mary's, it occurred to us that we do not want those of you without prayer rocks to feel bad. This being South Jersey and all, without many sizable rocks, (my rock came from out of state, actually,) if you don't have or cannot find a decent prayer rock, we thought you might consider the use of a prayer dog. Every time you pet your prayer dog, it can remind you to pray. Now if you don't have a pet or are allergic to dander, you certainly must have some shoes, so why not prayer shoes? Every time you put them on, you can pray. Or, you could put a pebble in your shoe and every time your foot gets jabbed by the pebble you can say a prayer. Really there's no end to the amount of prayer items you can have. The important thing, we suppose, is that you wrap your prayer item in attractive fabric.
Seriously, I could not make this stuff up. All steps besides #7 were true to the prayer rock method as described. My only regret is that the day was pretty much a complete waste of time and money, other than as fodder for the website and continued evidence of our diocese's demise.
If the examples given from the day's workshop were the only reasons St. Mary's cited for resisting merger and closure, they would be reasons enough.
*As an aside, this is from her syllabus for the class Intro to Catholicism/Senior Theology. They are the five "competencies" the students are supposed to accomplish.
1. To know the main issues it Catholic Social Justice.
2. To gain a basic understanding of the effects of Catholic Social teaching on the world.
3. To foster the discernment process for their future lives.
4. To initiate comprehension of the significance of the human body as a gift from God.
5. To develop a global understanding of their role in society.
So Catholic social justice, personal discernment, sexuality, and social roles are what one should be learning in a Senior Theology/Intro to Catholicism class. Social, social, social. Huh. Seems to me there are some significant things missing, like maybe God???